i nearly complete everything
but.. god take away wat i rly wan
my love..
god r making me b alone back

i hate tis kind of life...

the reason why i quit everything n why i left tis world without sign when i done everything =)

the reason why i quit everything =)
is bcoz of she find a perfect match..
is the day i quit online..
reason..
i gave wat she wan in her attire life =)
she needs me.. i done =)
she loves me.. i done 2 =)
she ask me don leave her at her sides.. i make it everytime =)
she wan me til end of her life.. i can make it in solo-ing
why.. from secondary 2 i met her n gone at half months..
at secondary 3.. she appear back and find me..
bring back my heart and everything..
she passed..
but.. 2 years later.. sad things comes around me
leave me without any sign
any shadows of her
none voice
n letters from her
day by day i send 2 her all my gd thgs n bad thgs happen on me
but.. no sign.. no reply.. none

the day tat i leave this world..
is because of she had married n make a family stairs =)

i understand that loves cant force..
but when i c her pictures...
online at msn...
facebook..
or skype..
i cant stand wna talk wif her..
she rly take away my heart and keep it
but now.. no more..
i feel like watching this place... whr i am
change
time past very fast in here..
she also always said..
im a good guy who she nvr ever met..
but thg changed in 2 years

reason why.. i hate my self so much...!~
bcoz i cant even protect her..
our journey are far..
2 years coupling.. never met
never even make couple thgs
like example
dating..
but why the love she gaves me r deep than i thought?
boys would'nt cry..
but i sob-ing...
tears came out from my eyes rapidly..
when i thg about her
i even changed everything..
life..
laugh like a normal guy..
make my self happy =)
i tried..
but..
it onli give me sadness..
emo-ing in my life..
earth...
world...
heaven or hell...
have L.O.V.E tis words..
but.. it just words..
it won't happen between humans
she used knife stab in my heart as deeply as she can =)
but when she pull out the knife..
blood came out just like water at mountain..
it was more pain..
than everything that hit us..

in my life..
it's not incomplete at all..
my dream had ended..
the good of me..
the funny of me..
it's gone..

i'm always alone in my house..
just like jail.
no more freedom either =')

the first day us until v nvr contact... 2 months i finally understand something also.. abt my life =')

first day we met.. at facebook..
n play sdo-x wif each other
first time we met face 2 face.. is at mc donald..
second time.. is i bring ue to bank for reload money to some1
third time.. is bring u out n eat..
forth time.. we go red box wif 2 of my frens n ur fren =) n went to my home for chat while let u online at my pc =)
but... when the first day of spm.. v accident..
from tat time i thinking until today.. 5/1/2011 (wednesday 4.00am)
i finally think.. that we cant love each other coz of we r not match =)
life changed since we not contact while i stay here
ever since u blame on me everything.. but.. idk hw 2 solve these problems..
suicide my self coz of ue..?
or.. keep moody-ing everyday..?
i very hope tat.. time could go back as i wish..
after everything.. i felt like my body.. is no longer human
just like a demon.. or watever...
but love... it changed everything =')
tears... drop from my eyes when i thk of our happiness thk i ever make for ue coz of i wna prove tat ILY.. bt ended in 1 month like tat...
no shadows.. no sign of u.. none talk.. n none face 2 face

no.. more.. fate.. on .. us..

and im so sry tat i hurt u
sry tat i felt through
sry tat i was falling in love wif u =')
sry tat it came true
and sry it does'nt turn back time =')

4 gals waiting me...
slowly..
1 by 1...
finally gone.. =')
single...
lonely...
none smile face on me...
happiness..
onli emo on my face..

feel like stucking on the wrong path...
walk 2 left...? or right..?
demon world...? or angel world...?
reaper...? or sword...?
black wing...? or white wing...?
none...
im stuck at the middle of the road...
people always said.. im a good guy.. nice guy..
but for me.. it's onli a story.. or simply said..
no1 understand wat i wan..
wat i wan is.. people make me happy..
but... family makes my life bcome more and more tired...

=')

i wish we could get back like last time...

Do v noe how worth we argue until we break..?
its not worth dying for..?
is it take your breathe is we argue..?
or u feel urself suffocating..?

Does the pain went out of the pride..?
or do u look for a place 2 hide from me..?
or did some1 steal ur heart away from me..?

we're gone..? love..?

im try to lay down my arms..
to give up the fight..
i throw my arms up to the skies..
is coz of u and i..!

when you are at the end of the road..
and u lost all sense of control..
and u throughts have taken their toll..
when ur mind breaks the spirits of our souls..
ur faith walks on the broken glass..
and the hangover doesn't pass..
nothing ever built to last..
we're in runs..

Did u try to leave on ur own..?
when you burn down ur love.. and my love..?
did u stand 2 close to the fire..?
like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone..

when it is time for me to leave and suicide n die..
and u fail to ask me come back..
something side this heart had block us..
we're the end..?

isn't it..?
i just hope..
everything would back to normal..
like how we are in last time =') ..
i being leave without any msg..
just like master throw their puppets when it bcome useless =')

i Just Wna Live wif a normal life
i Just wna love you , care you , and 2gather wif u like last time..

Hard..?

*sigh*

izzit true?

from now im lonely =)
no sdo mami...
no game de family...
no her
no hope for me either
i feel im at tis world is so lonely
from juz nw 6.30pm until 8.30pm i ask my self 2 moon
am i a boy who was lonely in tis planet?
should i b heartless?
or should i b nobodies?
every1 r different...
every1 r change...
wat happen 2 earth people?
y all treat me r different way?
izzit im doin everythg is nt enuf gd?
im alone nw...
inside home...
outside home...
even online im oso alone...
i said 2 my self i wna have hapi life
but i feel.. gods r nt giving me
my heart r noisy..
im been nt smiling the true way again
i don't wna to make tis happen again
but... i feel im strange now
i onli noe..
the person who i dam hate... very hate... is nearing me
the person who i dam love... very love... is keep far away from me
even although 90% of person not so wanna i leave here
all wanna i stay at malaysia or penang?

*sigh*

im nobodies start now
even im a heartless 2..

no familes
no love
no body will treat me nicely
im suffering in tis world..

undang-undang

my 4th times liao i fail my undang2... dammit... someone teach me how to exam?! im gonna bomb if continue like tat god dammit =.=''

wan.... faster.... pass.... undang.... undang!!!!!!!!!~~~

help...

help...

help!!!

Love Story Of My Life With A Girl

I promise her i'll be right here waiting for her
but what get at last is nothing i wan

*stories begin*

i was a boy who din know what called happy what called family day
who always alone inside family until i become a heartless
when i was in secondary 1
even what i want they bought for me
but always i been have a blind scolded by them
people said family r first in our life
but i feel i have no family
ever since i with family gone out i cant laugh at all
they talk happily at car
only me in part of them is the most silence one
i hear my own music with earphone with loud volume
until now... it began..

a lot of people like to say that i a good guy
but i hard 2 believe it
until i'm at secondary 2
there's a girl appeared in front of my window life messenger
we talk with each other happily
we play until we laugh
ever since she appear in front of me i feel i'm not so alone anymore
when we started our first love her friends stop us for love each other
and we gone like that when our first day in love
when the next day she try explain everything to them everything
they started making us back together each other
when she tell me the second times i was'nt thinking of anything
straight accept her without thinking
but when we started this love
she din find me for 2 years
no and message from her
her sound.. for this 2 years
i tell myself i wanna to wait her
but i cant.. and so i forgot about everything with her and started hate her
when she come back and find me
she told me.. not i wanna to leave u this 2 years..
it's my mom stop me for online and keep my phone for concentrate my study
i was not trusted in the earlier
but i think back always she appear in front of me
i smile
i laugh
and my heart started have her feeling back once again
after a few weeks i'm thinking
we accept each other once again
2 years we couple
but maybe it's not count 2 years
it's few months n break n together back n break
i sad cause of her
tears drop out from my eyes
try thinking to suicide my own self
but.. all i can do is get her back
keep repeating same thing
break cause argue
cause of her bad mood
until the year of 2010
we break with each other
without any reason again
and that time i'm really waiting for her
but i din expect that she said wanna be single
for a moment
she talk different to me
she's no more her original one
and i started to bring her back
like what she bring back my feels last time
but maybe it cant anymore
but maybe it still can
she always said
U're Only One Who At My Heart... Leon
and so i started to bring back her
until now...

----> are some families treat their kids like what my family treat?
<---- maybe have and maybe no...

----> i hope me and her are as same as this picture forever..
<---- i hope we can be forever love in this world